OK, I thought I would come up with my top 5 suggestions for people to observe in order to make online gaming a happier and more enlightening past time as opposed to the verbal mine field of cheats that it can be:
1) DON'T BE RACIST/HOMOPHOBIC OR DETAIL YOUR SEXUAL DESIRES ABOUT ANOTHER GAMERS FAMILY MEMBER
This is self explanatory and is not cool in the slightest. This seems to be the reserve of teenage games players who for some reason seem unable to play a game without their gums flapping about constantly, usually spouting some inane drivel about their sexual prowess, the racial heritage of people they cannot see and also the sexual orientation of their would be adversaries or indeed, their own team mates.
It does not need me to point out that not only can some of this be offensive but also is a violation of the terms and conditions of the online service, be it X Box Live or the Playstation Network, that they agreed to adhered to when they registered their gamer tag. Not only is there the facility to report these imbeciles but they can be muted and have their communications blocked. However it does not excuse this happening in the first place and no one should have to listen to their vile tirades.
Oh, and by the way, don't think that you cannot be tracked down just because you are on the other side of the world spouting your garbage in what you perceive to be the sanctity of your own homes. You can be traced and you can be got to. Just bear in mind that you have no idea who it is you are offending or what they might do for a living.
2) SPAWN CAMPING IS FOR LOSERS WHO CANNOT PLAY GAMES.
This is my personal favorite one to hate. Spawn camping bastards who just find a nice little nook or cranny near your teams spawn point and sit or lay there the whole round shooting you as soon as you spawn. Hey, guess what? You are a dick! Strangely enough there is no skill involved in doing this and it's actually no fun to play against people who think that this is a viable strategy in order to win a game.
As you sit there racking up your kill streak imaging how frustrated and bored you would become if someone was doing this to you. Then imagine you quitting the game because there was really no point in playing anymore. Now imagine other people doing the same and hey presto! No one ends up playing the game because the brain donors who are spawn camping all the time have killed it.
Try actually moving in the game, you know, take a risk - live a little! Who knows you might actually like it!
3) GLITCHING IS FOR LOSERS WHO CANNOT PLAY GAMES.
Yep, similar to point 2, glitchers are another breed of game spoiling idiots that somehow think that gaining an advantage by cheating is somehow makes them a better gamer. Now, it is often the case that a game has a glitch or two in it that the developers patch in due time. However a glitcher will take full advantage of this to their own benefit thus spoiling the game for everyone else.
There is no real excuse for it. OK you might stumble across it by accident, but more often than not once a glitch has been revealed it is suddenly exploited in nearly every game you join. It always appears to be the same person that is taking advantage of it as well. Whilst everyone else runs around trying to squeeze some enjoyment out of proceedings, your common garden glitcher forgoes any attempt to play the game and instead sets themselves up to exploit the glitch.
I have stopped playing many an online game because of this as there is just no point in playing it anymore and by the time the glitch has been patched by the developers, I have moved onto something else.
4) LEARN SOME GAMING ETIQUETTE.
This can cover quite a wide area of behaviour but I really want to narrow it down to the manner some play games. Team killing for example. There is always one who joins the game then sets about killing all and sundry on the screen, even though it is clear that it is a team based game mode.
Usually these gimps end up getting kicked but not before they have put everyone else in a foul mood and ruined the session. In the minds of these morons, they think that they are comedy legends when as a matter of fact that are annoying little turds that need to be flushed away down the nearest toilet never to be seen again.
The sad fact is that these arse wipes tend to also manifest the same the symptoms as seen in the previous points and their whole existence online seems to be centred around causing as much misery as possible. It is remarkable that they actually spend money on a game just to join in with people they don't know and annoy the living hell out of them.
I would have thought that being kicked from one game to another would get quite boring but it seems that they have sufficient numbers to crop up at least once every sessions and cause general misery!
5) LET THE WOOKIE WIN!
That's right. You know it makes sense to let me win. You will find your gaming experience to happier and your life will become fulfilled. You will come across fewer idiots online, you will feel light and gleeful. Your every whim and desire will be satiated all for letting me win online.
Surely that is worth a few moments of anguish!
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